Global Grandparents

Christmas events

2012-01-31T07:21:00.000-08:00

Question - How do you deal with Christmas when a visiting relative is admitted to hospital?

Answer - Quickly adjust all previous plans encourage other visitors and family members to make the best of things.
The most important thing is to visit the 'poor' patient every visiting time (for the full length of time) to ensure they don't feel left out or a burden.
Next, ensure all celebrations and meals take place between visiting times - and encourage everyone to enjoy themselves.
Family time can be spent during the evenings, once visiting time is over and everyone can relax together for a few hours.

Christmas 2011 Posting Deadlines

2011-10-10T01:35:00.000-07:00

It's that time again!
If you're sending cards/parcels overseas, these are the dates you need to know:

International Surface Mail
Fri 30th September Non-European destinations except Middle East, South Africa, Far East, USA and Canada
Tue 4th October Middle and Far East (except Hong Kong and Singapore)
Tue 18th October South Africa, Hong Kong, Singapore, the USA and Canada
Tue 8th November Eastern Europe, Greece, Cyprus, Turkey, Malta and Iceland
Tue 22nd November Western Europe

International Airmail
Mon 5th December South & Central America, Caribbean, Africa, Middle East, Asia, Far East (including Japan), Australia and New Zealand
Fri 9th December Eastern Europe, USA and Canada
Mon 12th December Western Europe

Be sure to get to the Post Office in time to avoid disappointment.

The Best Gifts for Grandchildren

2011-09-23T01:07:00.000-07:00

When The Beatles sang "Money can't buy me love", I think they were right. Personally, I'm always thrilled when someone is delighted with something I've bought or done for them, regardless of cost and effort.

For me, giving appropriate gifts can often be as rewarding for the giver as the receiver. For global grandparents, it is an opportunity to show how much you care, so consider your gifts carefully, as they can help or hinder your relationship with those special grandchildren in your life.

Younger children usually want toys so, if you're unsure, it's worth checking with parents what their current favourites are. Offer to send money so that an appropriate gift from you can be bought locally. This ensures it will be really welcome, arrive on time and be unbroken - plus it will save you postage costs.

For older children, money is always a good choice, but ensure you send a money order if the currency differs from home, to avoid those bank exchange charges. Alternatively, gift vouchers such as iTunes, Play.com, Amazon are universally welcome. All of these can be arranged online, so it's quick and easy.

Taking time to find out what your grandchildren like will encourage them to appreciate the thought you've put towards finding a suitable gift and perhaps, they'll even think you're "cool". Happy thinking!

Using Skype helps new grandparents

2011-07-12T09:22:00.000-07:00

A couple of our closest friends excitedly reported the arrival of Amy, their first grand-daughter. Whilst they're fortunate enough to visit their grandsons every week, they're anxiously counting the minutes until they see little Amy in person.

Watching them use Skype to talk with their daughter, a first-time mum, whilst gazing at their grand-daughter (who didn't like the computer screen) reminded me of our many contributors who admitted finding long-distance grandparenting challenging and/or distressing.

It made me think that, whilst I hope our son and his eventual family will live close to our home, I mustn't assume our wish will come true, as our own parents will testify.

Congratulations to everyone who manages to make it work.
It is challenging? - yes...
heart-breaking? - sometimes...
a substitute for the personal visits? - never
and, if I end up being a long-distance grandparent, I think I'll probably agree!

Staying Sane when the Grandparents visit

2011-06-17T04:21:00.000-07:00

Peter and I were approached by author Ellen Himelfarb, who was researching an article (title above) for the website Mommyish.com.

She was keen to learn what the outcome of our research was and whether we could share any tips with her readers. True to form, Peter and I shared our (often) differing versions of how to survive.

To read Ellen's article in detail, please click here.

Meeting with expat friends

2011-03-04T08:08:00.000-08:00

Whenever anyone tells me that the world is "smaller than we think", I always laugh - because I know they're right! Here's why.

Sandra, my closest friend in Holland, has a lovely daughter who's now studying at Manchester University, not too far from my UK home. Another friend I met overseas lives only 2 miles away from my parent's house in Newcastle. And there are many similar instances that I shan't bother to explain here.

So, if anyone suggests that the world is small - I nod and agree because, in my experience, it's true!

"Round Robins"

2010-12-17T00:28:00.000-08:00

At this time of year, we receive "Round Robins" from around the globe. If you don't keep in touch with old friends regularly, it's a fun way to let them know what you've been up to during the year.

This year's highlights include playing beach rugby in Dubai, whilst our own son played in 2 inches of snow here in the UK!

Whilst I love to hear news from friends, my own favourite Robin regularly visits my garden. His singing cheers me up as I try not to let him distract me when I'm supposed to be working...

Merry Christmas everyone.

UK Christmas Card posting dates

2010-11-05T06:02:00.000-07:00

Christmas is coming ... and to ensure you don't miss the International Airmail postal deadlines for cards and small packages, here are the dates you need:

Mon 6 Dec 2010 - South & Central America, Caribbean, Africa, Middle East, Asia, Far East (including Japan), Australia and New Zealand

Fri 10 Dec 2010 - Eastern Europe, USA and Canada

Mon 13 Dec 2010 - Western Europe

It's time to get organised so that you don't miss the post ... or perhaps you just wish to create a Christmas email? It's the environmentally friendly way to stay in touch - and is much quicker too.

"Angel of the North"

2010-10-19T09:58:00.000-07:00

One happy reader sent a postcard from Newcastle Upon Tyne suggesting that, by following the book's tips and email instructions, we'd "given her wings" - meaning the freedom to maintain links with her loved ones, in a modern and life-enhancing fashion. I just love the description, Isobel and the postcard is fabulous too!

Preparing Christmas

2010-09-21T03:37:00.000-07:00

I've just heard a reader who, this year, will be fortunate enough to experience something that Peter has already done. Camping in the desert at Christmas time.

I'm really rather jealous at the thought - although will be happily at home with my family and friends.

Makes me think though ... perhaps we should do something different this Christmas?!

China in Manchester

2010-07-21T10:16:00.001-07:00

I've been fortunate recently to teach English to some students from China's Ministry of Finance at the Manchester Business School. They've enjoyed reading the book, as it helps them cope with living away from their families - but is excellent language practice!

Here's a photo of the group outside the magnificent John Rylands Library in Manchester city centre.

Thank you Rita

2010-06-15T08:00:00.000-07:00

I received a lovely mail from Rita, who has successfully used her newly created Visitor's pack. An old friend, Sally and family, could only visit during a week that Rita had to work. She'd already booked her children into a rather expensive sports camp that couldn't be cancelled. Rita wanted to make sure Sally's family explored as much as possible and thought the Visitor's pack idea could help.

Rita (and family) collected maps and leaflets of things they knew would interest their visitors. Having shown Sally how to use the ticket machine, evenings were spent together planning the next day's activity. Both families (especially the children) got involved, which Sally's family really appreciated even though the days were spent separately.

The visit was enjoyable for everyone, although they plan to ensure that they can spend more time exploring together next time!

Developing "Independent" visitors

2010-05-13T07:05:00.000-07:00

Having visited the lovely "Musicians of Bremen" statue over six times within a few months with different sets of visitors, we needed an escape mechanism!

The solution - a Visitor's pack. It's cheap and easy to include:
* local maps
* public transport timetables
* written instructions on how to use tickets machines (use pictures if your visitors don't speak the language)
* leaflets about local tourist attractions
* current exhibitions
* rainy day ideas and suggestions (downloaded copies of crosswords in their native language, nearby swimming baths, etc)

Trust me it works... and more importantly, it gets you out of visiting the same tourist attraction 20+ times during your assignment!

Sometimes the temporary move becomes permanent

2010-04-16T10:05:00.000-07:00

When Peter and I created a Global Grandparent Survey in 2008, we received many wonderful responses. I'd like to share this inspiring one with you - just to prove that distance doesn't automatically have a negative impact on family relationships. We found this uplifting and hope you will too.

'I feel sad to be so far apart - it wasn't planned but did happen. My daughter is now an American citizen and has been there for almost 24 years. She is happy there and I am happy in the UK. We have a very good and close relationship on the telephone, exchanging calls two or three times a week, and rely on each other for emotional support when necessary - more than we do with anyone else.
'We laugh a lot together and are probably closer in spirit than if we lived nearer to each other. We have got used to the distance over the years but it is hard to cope when things are not too good in each other's lives; health problems etc.'
RM

Thanks to "Sylvie"

2010-02-15T09:40:00.000-08:00

I received a lovely mail from a lady that I'll refer to as "Sylvie".

She doesn't wish me to use her real name, as Sylvie is hoping that her family doesn't find out ... how she's transformed into a "model" visitor!

Having recognised that previous visits were rather tense, Sylvie wasn't sure what to do. Fortunately, she came across a copy of GG in her local library and thought "it was worth a look". By adopting some of our tips, her last couple of visits have been "super". After Sylvie's last visit when calling to say she'd arrived home safely, her daughter-in-law asked when she'd be visiting again - even suggesting some dates! Proof that "they've found their way" with the long-distance links.

Well done Sylvie and thank you for letting us know about your success.

Using Skype to keep in touch

2010-01-08T06:46:00.000-08:00

The holiday period regularly encourages people to review their life, perhaps making resolutions of improvements they wish to adopt.

Many families find that one simple recommendation has altered their lives - for the better. Using Skype to keep in touch with family and friends.

Rather than exchanging emails, cards and letters, how fantastic would be it be have a "face-to-face" chat via the internet? The technology is really easy to use, doesn't cost anything (other than a little bit of new equipment) and will improve your life enormously.

Not sure it's for you?
Find someone who already uses Skype and let them show you how easy it is. I'll be amazed if you don't want to try it yourself - my family loves it!

Thinking of families

2009-12-08T04:15:00.000-08:00

Especially those separated at this time of year always makes me feel sad for those who will find the holiday season difficult.

We were fortunate enough to have both sets of grandparents celebrate with us overseas. Our first challenge was explaining why we'd eat goose (a delicious German alternative) instead of turkey!

When we couldn't be together, Skype and telephone calls were our usual seasonal fare.

Back in the UK again, we're looking forward to welcoming the whole family this year. We'll celebrate with a delicious meal adapted from our favourite dishes served in Germany, Holland and the UK. A truly "expat" traditional meal.

Use the festive season to contact family and friends, whether you can be together or not, as there's nothing more important than the special people in your lives.

ExpatWomen review

2009-11-09T01:30:00.000-08:00

Since writing the book, I've received many suggestions on how to share the hints and tips to the families who need them. One person suggested to me was Andrea Martins (busy expat extraordinaire), who runs the superbly helpful Expat Women Blog. It's something I used to read when I lived overseas and found it really helpful.

Having recently relocated her family (again), Andrea has finally found some time to read the book - and says:

" ... I would like to recommend it to any new grandparents out there who have not been expats themselves and who are simultaneously trying to understand both the world of grandparenting and the expat world that their children now live in."

To read Andrea's full comments, click Expat Women: Click Here

Hopefully buying the book will help other global families survive the challenges of living apart.

Coming Full Circle by Peter Gosling

2009-11-04T06:57:00.000-08:00

For some reason, we never expected that the day would come when we were able to say "we told you so" to our expat family. But it has and we can sit back and watch, and sympathise with, how they react to what happened to use twenty-one years ago. Yes, our grandson has left and gone to university.

How we remember the day when our daughter not only got married but, within a few hours of the ceremony, had left England for a life in foreign parts. It all happened just before Christmas and I'll leave it to you to imagine how jollity was not to be on the menu for that festive season! But we got used to it and found that having a family living in a land that provided us with many holidays opened up a whole new range of experiences for us.

Then the first grandson arrived and the inevitable rush to visit that roly-poly baby who would eventually turn into a six-foot mop head of an undergrad. Luckily we were able to track the career of this new addition to our family and his sibling as they trekked around the world. We watched them get bigger, more interesting and able to have a conversation, until late teens they reached that stage when they joined those who communicate in grunts. It was fascinating to watch them develop into, almost, human beings with talents, interests and minds of their own.

Then finally, the crunch came and university was the next step. Not only was that to be in London but the family was now based in Holland. That scrap of life that we used to call "Little Fat Sam" was now leaving his nest and travelling to live and survive in, what as far as his parents were concerned, foreign parts. Luckily the distance is not too great, but there is one less chair at the breakfast table. Now the empty nest syndrome hits and we have to sit back and watch, knowing how our daugher must feel, just as we did, twenty-one years ago. The wheel has inevitably come full circle.

Did you know that?

2009-10-15T02:03:00.000-07:00

In April 1999, the National Grandparents Day Council announced that the official flower for National Grandparents Day was the:

Forget-Me-Not

I love their choice and wonder how other people feel about it?

Grandparents Day (UK) 2009

2009-10-04T01:34:00.000-07:00

Sunday 4th October 2009 is National Grandparents day in the UK.

This celebration was introduced into the UK by Age Concern in 1990, as a way of raising awareness for the old. The date of the celebration was not fixed until last year in 2008, when it was agreed that National Grandparents day in the UK would be on the first Sunday in October. This means that the future dates for National Grandparents day are:-

Sunday 3rd October 2010
Sunday 2nd October 2011
Sunday 7th October 2012
Sunday 6th October 2013
Sunday 5th October 2014

If you are looking for the perfect gift, then look at my book "How to be a Global Grandparent" which you can get from Amazon

Greater Manchester Chamber of Commerce

2009-06-04T02:09:00.000-07:00

Matthew Hall, from the Greater Manchester Chamber of Commerce PR Department came out to see me today to talk to me about my book "How to be a Global Grandparent"

Read Article

Customer Review (5 Star)

2009-05-17T15:08:00.000-07:00

I was so happy today because a very nice lady from Ireland gave my book 5 stars. 5 stars that is the best that you can get at Amazon. She

"... particularly liked the section on empowering grandparents to communicate with their Global Grandchildren, with the simple guildelines to overcoming technophobia and tackling the modern channels of 21century communication. ..."

She also thought it was

"...Easy to read and a down-to-earth approach - Highly recommend it!"

It was so good getting praise from somebody that I had never met and it made me feel that all the hard work that I had put in to writing the book was worth it

See Full Review at Amazon

Silver Surfers Day 2009

2009-05-16T03:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, thousands of people up and down the country attended events to learn more about IT. Based on the hints and tips in my book, I was invited to Sale Library to assist with training sessions.

Bill is a keen photographer, whose interest lies in steam engines. He regularly travels the UK to take photos of these "beautiful machines". I learned a thing or two about them myself, as his knowledge is fantastic!

Siegrun is a retired lady, who now surfs the net regularly. We worked on sending and receiving emails, adding photos to messages and general computer management systems.

Many thanks to Nancy Murray, Manager at Sale Library who invited me to take part. It was really enjoyable and I'm already looking forward to next year's Silver Surfers Day!

Our previous site...

2009-05-08T02:36:00.000-07:00

As we're nearing publication date, I thought it might be helpful to create an "official" blog where we can exchange feedback or comments with other global citizens.

To make things easier, we're transferring some of the previously published information here but if you wish to view the previous "How to be a Global Grandparent" site, please click here

Step by step guide for Grandparents

2009-03-01T15:06:00.000-08:00

When I was living abroad in the Netherlands, I found it difficult to maintain family ties, while my dad Fred Pattinson and mum Peggy, both 74, were desperate to play their part in my son's formative years.

So I created a series of step-by-step, long-distance computer lessons to help them stay in touch via the web.

It made me realise the problems modern grandparents face when building relationships with relatives who live hundreds of miles away. Next, I got together with Peter Gosling, a long-term, long-distance grandparent of 20 years, and created a book called "How to be a Global Grandparent". The book comes complete with various practical solutions and stories from other global grandparents.

For me, I have found that "Technology can be a great help. My dad is now a silver surfer and it has opened up a new life for him, while my mum tends to tell give him instructions on what to type."

If you would like some help on how to be a global grand parent then check out

Amazon

Tamara Colver Nutting comments

2009-01-19T03:18:00.000-08:00

"If only ... there had been internet 40 years ago when I became an "expat" (isn't there some other term?!!!). I never cease to be amazed at the amount of information out there and find myself still at the computer way after midnight!

How alone (but never lonely) I felt all those years ago when I had my children in Sweden and subsequently moved to Argentina, where I've lived the past 25 years. Very few of my friends or family had done anything like it, and there were no helpful guidelines around. History repeated itself when my own children moved abroad and now I'm the grandmother!

... Only wish the book had been available when my parents were still alive and active. Good for you..!"

It all depends on how much effort we parents put in

2009-01-19T02:23:00.000-08:00

Another positive comment from a US expat:

"I live in the US and am very aware that my parents miss us, especially their almost-4-year-old granddaughter, Grace. I try to keep in touch as much as possible and send pictures weekly by e-mail, sometimes several times a week. And we all talk on the phone most weeks. It's far from perfect but to be honest, our little girl has a stronger bond with my parents in England than my husband's parents in the US!

It all depends on how much effort we, as parents, put into making the relationship strong, even if long-distance. I was the one who travelled to live abroad so I take on the responsibility happily. I know how important it is for all of us to keep in touch when we can't see each other as often as we'd like. I have sent this website address to my Mum and hope she gets some helpful tips from it. I think it's great! Thank you."

Communications from the US

2009-01-08T02:30:00.000-08:00

A "guilty daughter" provided me with this insight and her comments struck a chord, as it's how I approached things:

"I live in the US and am very aware that my parents miss us, especially their almost-4-year-old grand-daughter, Grace. I try to keep in touch as much a possible and send pictures weekly by e-mail, sometimes several times a week. And we talk on the phone most weeks. It's far from perfect but to be honest our little girl has a stronger bond with my parents in England than my husband's parents in the US! It all depends on how much effort we, as parents, put into making the relationship strong, even if long distance.

I was the one who travelled to live abroad so I take on the responsibility happily. I know how important it is for all of us to keep in touch when we can't see each other as often as we'd like. I have sent this website address to my Mum and hope she gets some helpful tips from it. I think it's great! Thank you."

Did you see me on Channel M?

2009-01-07T13:01:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was interviewed by the lovely Georja Calvin-Smith. She and her cameraman colleague spent hours filming a 4 minute slot for the news show. They moved lights, furniture, plants and photo frames, to get the pictures they wanted; then encouraged me to wave my hands around a bit "like I'd normally do", rather than sit statue-ike (with nerves I might add)! Georja's persuasive powers even worked with our 14-year-old son James who, wearing his Sale Sharks shirt with pride, was interviewed on camera and whilst e-mailing his Grandparents, Fred and Peggy in Newcastle Upon Tyne.

Georja described our "collage of memories" - lots of cut-out photos displayed in an enormous picture frame that takes pride of place in our home to remind us of visiting guests. She even warned those "not so good" house guests that they wouldn't appear on the collage if their behaviour didn't merit it!

Great fun, although I couldn't be on TV every day - it's exhausting!

Newspaper review

2009-01-05T15:18:00.000-08:00

A very nice man came out to Interview me today from the local Newspaper the Metro News. He came to Interview me about my forthcoming book "How to be a Global Grandparent"

The article that he wrote was quite good.

Read the full article at MetroNews

If you look closely at the screen then you can just about see my business web site which can be found at www.reo-solutions.co.uk

I'm being interviewed on BBC Radio Manchester

2008-12-09T11:15:00.000-08:00

What a surprising morning... I've been asked in to the studio to be interviewed on Heather Stott's Breakfast Show - makes me feel rather like a celebrity, albeit on one of the lower lists! I'll be talking about how I came to write the book and how it ties in with the services offered by my consultancy, REO-Solutions Limited. We help people relocating into the area find somewhere to live, schools for their children etc. as I know how hard it can be when you don't know your way around somewhere new.

Thanks for doing this ...

2008-11-27T02:55:00.000-08:00

and keep up the good work - said Sandra from the Netherlands.

Well Sandra, if we make keeping in touch easier for only one family, our book will have served its purpose. Hope you enjoy it and thank you for your encouragement.
Anne and Peter